Sunday, October 24, 2010
"You do not marry the one you love, but you love the one you marry"
This quote divides many people into two broad schools of thought.
When I first heard this saying I felt sadness and pity for the one who said it. Why should anyone not marry the one they love? It feels like one party is being forced to be with another without any choice. Marriage is a life long commitment, and should not be taken lightly. If you end up having to love the one you marry, then it seems to suggest that you did not give much thought to the level of commitment that is involved, and now you are living in regret.
But is such a view too impulsive? Is there more to this saying than what meets the eye? Everyone in a committed relationship will know that nobody is perfect, and everybody will have their flaws. Baggage if you will, that slowly comes to the surface with time. Nobody really knows that the full extent of the baggage is, and maybe nobody will ever be fully aware in their lifetime, but is this saying that true love is greater than any baggage? Suddenly, I feel respect for the one who said it.
Do I agree with this saying? I'm not sure. We all wish that it said you marry the one you love, and you love the one you married. Perhaps the original quote maps reality better, perhaps ideals are dreams in imagination, perhaps some find the pleasure of living a dream in reality. But what I am sure of right now is that I should stop dreaming of a reality, and start preparing for my presentation on Tuesday.
Dan
4:59 pm
